heartbreak

Complacent

Tension rests it's head on our pillows 
Squeezing in past careless complacency,
finding a home in my pained longing for more 
This new roommate seems far too comfortable in our company
A threesome I never consented to
It's not an "elephant in the room"
It's the way I forget to make your coffee,
or how my skin is free of planted lips
How we both pretend not to notice  
Is this what together means? 
Or are we simply sat next to each other 
The fights don't feel worth starting, 
I'm already stuffed with empty promises
Threatening to overflow from every growing crack in this guise 
But boy do you sound sweet when you make them

Choke

I hope you choke on these words when you see me 
because I'm still choking on regret,
but I don't think you'd disagree 
if I said I'm still glad we met.

Because I'm still choking on regret,
I can't stop imagining what could've been (does he?) 
If I said I'm still glad we met,
would it sound like an admission or a plea? 

I can't stop imagining what could've been (does he?) 
I'm afraid you're someone my heart can't forget 
Would it sound like an admission or a plea
if I said I'm not ready for you to leave yet

We happened at the wrong time, I wish we could press reset
and I don't think you'd disagree; 
"We'd be together if I didn't go after her, I bet..." 
I hope you choke on these words when you see me.